I have spent a lot of time lately transferring old 8mm home video into digital format. This cannot be done quickly with the software I have so you are almost forced to watch all of your old films. I have seen videos of our wedding, a mission trip to the Philippines, military training from many moons ago, tons of video of our first child, and a couple of videos of houses we used to live in. With each of those videos I caught a further glimpse into myself for two reasons: 1) I typically was the one doing the recording, 2) I was able to see me in various settings when I was not recording – Christmas at my in-laws, military training, singing at church, interacting with my daughter.
I couldn’t put my finger on it at first but the more I saw of myself the less I liked myself. I was confident. Always appearing to have an answer. And then I started noticing what the problem was and still is. I am not humble. More so then than now – and not because I am more humble now, but rather I am less confident now. I am not God’s greatest gift to mankind. I am not God’s greatest gift to my spouse. I am not God’s greatest gift to my children, my family, my friends, my church, my enemies. I am nobody in the grand scheme of life. I have a small sphere of influence, but each person is the master of their domain. I looked up some verses that I think will do me well to remember and I will pass them on to you.
“The fear of the LORD is wisdom’s instruction, and humility comes before honor.” Proverbs 15:33
“He has told you men what is good and what it is the LORD requires of you: Only to act justly, to love faithfulness, and to walk humbly with your God.” Micah 6:8
“Do nothing out of rivalry or conceit, but in humility consider others as more important than yourselves.” Philippians 2:33
“Humble yourselves therefore under the mighty hand of God, so that He may exalt you in due time,…” 1 Peter 5:6
“All of you, take up My yoke and learn from Me, because I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for yourselves.” -Jesus in Matthew 11:29
Example: Moses – Numbers 12:3
Encouragement for being humble:
“The greatest among you will be your servant. Whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.” Matthew 23:11-12
“Humble yourselves before the Lord, and He will exalt you.” James 4:10
I am not entirely sure how to apply this in the multiple areas of my life. Is it a disregard for myself across the board? Is it a denial of “Me Time”? Is it meeting the needs of others even if what they desire from me is something I cannot meet? God is our fulfillment that can satisfy. I cannot fill those needs and longings in others – my wife, my children, my coworkers. Maybe it is me pointing to God when people are trying to find their fulfillment in me and I in myself?
The interesting part is that some people in the videos are obviously not as enthralled with me as I was with myself. But they never laid the smack down on me. What if they had? Would I have received it? Would I receive it now? Try it and let’s find out how I handle it.