A Vision

Well, I tried to do some research to help out the lady that I offended last week. I had already done everything that I could for her and another coworker had also helped the lady by doing the same things that I did. It is just frustrating when you communicate policies to people and they get mad at you because they think you have control over it. There is nothing I can do about it at this point but hope that in another week or so the people who can make the decision for her get in touch with her.

I don’t really have much to say right now. There is a lot going on. I am hoping that a friend of ours is doing well after having surgery on her thyroid to see if she has cancer or not. We are in the process of possibly moving to a new location by the end of next week or the end of June. I am reading a book by Andy Stanley called Visioneering. I am only to chapter four or so but it is pretty challenging to our current situation and circumstances. Time will tell if we have made the right decisions.

There is something I have learned about myself during this past week though, actually two things. First, I am a drifter. I don’t have a vision for life, a man made one or a God-given one. That is why I drift. When something no longer suits my fancy then I give it up in pursuit of something more satisfying all the while not knowing what is truly going to satisfy or get me to the place of fulfilling all that I was intended for in this life. Second, I am a very judgemental person. I did not realize this to the fullest extent until I friend revealed to me that I judge people very quickly without knowing anything about them. I guess I do that for two reasons, a.) I am just a judgemental on myself and expect people to match with the level that I hold myself too, b.) I am an introvert in regards to what I prefer in a social environment though my actions and personality appear to say I am an extrovert. I am hostile to the people and world around me. I want peace and I want it for myself. I am selfishly judgemental. I judge people based on my needs and standards and not one the cards they have been dealt or even bought themselves in life.

I am not sure what I am going to do about either of these at the moment other than keep reading the one book that one of my other friends suggested. As far as the judging goes, I am open for suggestions. How do you get to a point where you don’t look at people at the grocery store, gas station, your work center, or wherever and think that you have them sized up right away?

Needing to change as usual,
Boris the Illusionist

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